There's a bit of a pause, and then:] We have very short lifespans, compared to that of a normal human. The technology allows people to live past this end.
[This is exactly why he tries to run so hard from this subject!!!! But:]
...Those may have been related symptoms, though they were unusual ones for me. Typically, coughing blood is the biggest indicator of a person nearing their end, up until their body becomes too weak to carry on.
I agree. [HE AGREES!!! Reliver technology is bad and has corrupted people who were already not doing so well from the start...
As for the question, there's only a little moment of hesitation. Not because he isn't personally decided, but because he does hate laying it out there.]
I would. [An answer that comes without hesitation. He isn't afraid of death. He accepts that it's inevitable. But ultimately, he's a selfish person.]
...So long as it didn't place anyone else at risk of being harmed, I would. I would like nothing more than to continue living with Nadia, in good health.
[ there is a sense of relief that he has the will to live.... and that he is selfish enough for that. she is glad for it. ]
... That means you won't want the wish that comes with partnership, does it? I don't want to think your possibilities are limited. The cosmos is full of potential even if your country has limited itself to two.
[He isn't Matsui... even though he has Catholic Guilt. But! There's just a small little smile and a nod.]
That's correct. I can't tie another person's life to my own. [Not when he's already so close to death.] ...But I would like to think that another possibility may present itself, here. With so many different worlds and people, anything feels possible.
[ sometimes, if you accept death, you try not to think of another possibility. she can't read lucas' mind. ]
... If... when we escape here, I know there are ways to look into what may be your curse in my universe. If you are willing, I could reach out when this is all over.
[Oh... He looks a little surprised by the offer in and of itself, and surprised further still by the notion that there might be a way to further examine the curse elsewhere.]
...I wouldn't wish to trouble you, but... if you really think that's a possibility, I would appreciate it more than I can say.
It would be remiss of me not to offer. I don't know how much I can guarantee, but... there are whole organizations dedicated to studying things like this.
[ she is sure there is a scientist or five out there who would be interested or willing to do the research. ]
[Wow this is a terrible thing for someone who holds his own sister so dearly to have to watch!! And a terrible thing to watch in general, from the lived perspective of one of the people hurting worst about it. Sometimes brothers just fuck off and do whatever the hell.
It's so sad, to think about it. A path splitting. Two people going in different directions, when they'd been on the same journey for so long. To know in the aftermath that someone had slipped away from you, without you having noticed or realized.
He's just sort of quiet for a few seconds, and then:]
[ this is a memory that still shakes robin. sunday is her last living family, the one she trusts and loves the most, the one robin still believes in even though he betrayed her.
she takes a deep even breath. ]
... I have not seen him since then, but I will not abandon him.
she tries to smile and she manages it, but it's a little flimsy, especially compared to her usual. ]
I did. I woke... and was cared to. My brother.... I'm certain he is still alive, but they won't let me see him, and they won't tell me anything about him.
Ah... [His expression, despite her resolute firmness, is still a little concerned.] ...I hope, then, that you're able to find him soon, and get the answers you'd like to have.
I wonder... how possible that will be. [ what sunday has done is logically something that should have him arrested and tried on the highest level, but sill.... ]
I'll settle for his safety in some form.
[ she is scared of never seeing him again, but what she is even more scared of is knowing he'll never be there again. ]
He can understand this, though. If he could never see Nadia again, he would be devastated. If he could never see her again because she would never be anywhere again, he'd just be a husk.]
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There's a bit of a pause, and then:] We have very short lifespans, compared to that of a normal human. The technology allows people to live past this end.
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.... When you were feeling unwell.... is it because you are nearing the end of your lifespan?
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...Those may have been related symptoms, though they were unusual ones for me. Typically, coughing blood is the biggest indicator of a person nearing their end, up until their body becomes too weak to carry on.
[But yeah, he sure is!]
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I can understand why your country's citizens would want to extend their lives, but it's still too much to disregard any life with that option.
... Lucas, what have you decided?
[ from what she knows of him, she doesn't think he likes much about being a reliver, but.... to die young is also a horrible fate. ]
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As for the question, there's only a little moment of hesitation. Not because he isn't personally decided, but because he does hate laying it out there.]
I won't become a Reliver.
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she closes her eyes as she thinks. ]
Is there no other way to extend your life? Is there no cure to what kind of illness that ails you?
[ because it presents to her like a disease. ]
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It's a curse. One that's plagued my home for hundreds of years. To this day, we don't know its cause, and there is no cure for it.
[Only ways to step around it, via the Reliver technology.]
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If there were a way to extend your life that isn't anything like your Reliver technology, would you take it?
[ she can understand accepting death, but she wants to know, does he want to live? ]
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...So long as it didn't place anyone else at risk of being harmed, I would. I would like nothing more than to continue living with Nadia, in good health.
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[ there is a sense of relief that he has the will to live.... and that he is selfish enough for that. she is glad for it. ]
... That means you won't want the wish that comes with partnership, does it? I don't want to think your possibilities are limited. The cosmos is full of potential even if your country has limited itself to two.
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That's correct. I can't tie another person's life to my own. [Not when he's already so close to death.] ...But I would like to think that another possibility may present itself, here. With so many different worlds and people, anything feels possible.
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... If... when we escape here, I know there are ways to look into what may be your curse in my universe. If you are willing, I could reach out when this is all over.
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...I wouldn't wish to trouble you, but... if you really think that's a possibility, I would appreciate it more than I can say.
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[ she is sure there is a scientist or five out there who would be interested or willing to do the research. ]
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I see... It's the same way in my home, but we don't have multiple organizations working toward it.
[They don't have enough people for that...]
I would be willing to see what others may have to say about it, even so.
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before she can reply, the shadows aren't done with them yet. ]
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It's so sad, to think about it. A path splitting. Two people going in different directions, when they'd been on the same journey for so long. To know in the aftermath that someone had slipped away from you, without you having noticed or realized.
He's just sort of quiet for a few seconds, and then:]
...The two of you...
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she takes a deep even breath. ]
... I have not seen him since then, but I will not abandon him.
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[It had seemed like such a long fall down so far away that he'd automatically feared for the worst, but...]
...Even if you haven't seen him since, as long as you're both still alive, there's still hope.
[Honestly given everything they've learned here, there may even still be hope after a person is done being alive, damn.]
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she tries to smile and she manages it, but it's a little flimsy, especially compared to her usual. ]
I did. I woke... and was cared to. My brother.... I'm certain he is still alive, but they won't let me see him, and they won't tell me anything about him.
But he is someone I will never give up on.
[ her resolution is firm. ]
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Ah... [His expression, despite her resolute firmness, is still a little concerned.] ...I hope, then, that you're able to find him soon, and get the answers you'd like to have.
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maybe i'll tag you back for real later
but i'll alive you
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I wonder... how possible that will be. [ what sunday has done is logically something that should have him arrested and tried on the highest level, but sill.... ]
I'll settle for his safety in some form.
[ she is scared of never seeing him again, but what she is even more scared of is knowing he'll never be there again. ]
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He can understand this, though. If he could never see Nadia again, he would be devastated. If he could never see her again because she would never be anywhere again, he'd just be a husk.]
Then I'll hope for that, as well.